Abercrombie Is A Bitch

Walking to the back of the store, I am bombarded with the larger-than-life-sized photos of taut young torsos in blue jeans barely pulled up enough to crest the top of their pubic bone. Strangely, all of the very short zippers are undone in the pictures. I fantasize briefly about…

Even though I knew better, my daughter with the superstar style persuaded me to step through the portal of auditory hell to use a gift card she had long ago received for abercrombie and fitch. I blamed it on my practical nature as she led me right over the threshold to where the club level music volume was pulsing.

They have some nice looking stuff, but most of it requires layering (because it’s too skimpy to be worn without something under it or over it). After all, that’s their look for the female. They’ll cheerfully pull together an ensemble consisting of a cute tank top under a low cut paper thin t-shirt with a zipper hoodie to throw over the whole thing. That will probably be about $100 before you even look at the jeans, shorts or leggings.
I urged my teenage icon, “just grab a t-shirt off of the clearance table and let’s get out of here.” Oh yeah, I was a lot of fun to be with at this point. I looked around at the other shopping couples , they didn’t seem to be filled with a visceral hate for the overpriced, dimly lit haven for the soon-to-be deaf.abercrombie and fitch
…. ripping the ear bud off of the cashier’s head because her lips are moving but I can’t hear a word she is saying. Look, if you want me to pay you are going to have to tell me how much (but it’s too loud in here to hear) or maybe you could show me (but it’s too cave-like to see). No wonder we’re all overpaying in here. We just sign the bloody receipt so we can get out of the store without incident.abercrombie and fitch